Apparently, some people do not like they way we run our box and our business. We are too strict on the standards for the movements we teach and program. We are too strict on the rules we have like arrive on time and clean up after yourself (aka put your shit away when you’re done). We are too rude on the phone when people call us and give an open-ended statement like “So tell me about CrossFit.” We are too rude to people when they walk up and interrupt our classes because they are bored with watching their kid do karate next door or bored while they are getting their car fixed across the way. We are too strict on our hiring process because we expect our coaches to actually fucking teach, correct, and cue not just say “3-2-1-GO!” and look at their phone the whole rest of class. So let me address these things.
I am an asshole. And I am NOT sorry for it. What I am sorry for is that you cannot take blunt truths and often get butt-hurt about them. I am sorry that no one has ever told you what you need to do in such a regimented, matter of fact way. Let me tell you though a little about why I am an asshole.
Everyone is a “fitness” expert
Forget the fact that most trainers and or coaches suck. Why do people listen to any random fucker about what they need to do to get fit? Stop taking their word as the gospel. I make it a point to only listen to coaching cues/programming advice/fitness methodology from people who are stronger/fitter than me or have trained multiple people who are stronger/fitter than me. I DO NOT LISTEN TO WHAT ANYONE ELSE HAS TO SAY. It is that simple. Everything else below that level is probably useless to me or to my athletes.
Let me give you an analogy.
I once hung a sheet of drywall. I also once put down laminate flooring in a basement. I have also seen an episode of Holmes on Homes. Does that make me a contractor? Fuck NO. So why would I butt into conversations about remodeling homes and what grade of wiring is needed and which ducts should be used for a new HVAC unit? Oh wait, I don’t. I leave the real contractor work to contractors. Now I may get different opinions from different contractors, but I always will listen to the contractor with the best track record OVER what your husband who put in a new shower head for you said and stay with that.
So why do people listen to “broscience” and dudes that are constantly on a “bulking cycle” but have never done a bodybuilding show say? They are just fat dudes with big arms. Now, I love our military and police. They defend our freedom and have signed up to put their lives in harm’s way to keep us safe. But why do people listen to them just because they made it through boot camp or an academy? Just because they passed the basic physical requirement to be in the military or law enforcement does not mean they know anything about strength and conditioning. They know more than me about shooting guns, clearing rooms, and taking out bad guys but I know more about how to prepare an athlete for the platform.
People are lazy
I loathe laziness. Whether or not you believe in a higher power or not, the phrase “God helps those who help themselves.” has always stuck with me. You have the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Everything else has to be earned. Not fucking given, but earned.
But people expect the world to be handed over to them because of some misplaced sense of self-entitlement. Not in here. If you do not want to work hard, there is the door. You can leave. Better yet, don’t even come in; because we do not want your lazy cancer spreading.
Being “fit” or “strong” is hard. You have to earn every pound on the bar. You have to earn every extra pullup. You have to earn having a six-pack with nutrition. Yes, there are genetic freaks for who it comes easier, but at some point to get better EVERYONE must put in the work.
In the end, your excuse for why you cannot get “in-shape” is bullshit, you’re probably just lazy.
Everyone has an excuse
See here. See here. See here. Especially in the DMV, nothing is anyone’s fault, it is ALWAYS what someone else did to cause your own misfortune. No one has any personal responsibility for anything. Are you white and unhappy? It is most definitely the fault of black people and Obama. Are you black and unhappy? It is most definitely the fault of white people and Bush. Are you overweight and unhappy? It is clearly the fault of your genes; your environment and eating habits of the course of your life surely had nothing to do with it. Did you have to “stop working out” because of some minor injury? If only there were some examples of people who lost whole limb(s) and were still able to “get fit”. Surely there are no examples of that anywhere. . . . . . . . .
I’m totally sure you’re ACL tear in high school still limits you. . . . . .
People are prideful
I have never seen more adults who have health insurance and refuse to use it. If something bothers you for more than two weeks, use your insurance. Seriously, I have seen many overuse injuries, and we can work around a lot of things, but I am not a doctor. Pointing to a general area and giving vague descriptions of the pain you feel is a headache for the dude that gets your $20 co-pay, not for me.
We love that you have faith in us to change or modify workouts for you. But if we do not have an actual diagnosis, we cannot be sure that we are giving you the right modification or scale. Plus why do come in day in and day out bitching about your wrist/shoulder/elbow/knee/hip/back instead of taking the 60-90 minutes you might be here and use that time to go to the doctor. Maybe that pain would subside with some rest/ice/prescription anti-inflammatories.
Wait, so you had a bad experience with a doctor one time so you don’t like them anymore? Weird. I had a shitty girlfriend back in the day but I still wanted to get laid and fall in love after we broke up. Just try a new doctor, maybe he can be the one.
Adults cannot follow instructions
I have a hard enough time getting MY athletes to follow and do what they are supposed to do. It is hard enough getting people who PAY us and want to get better to follow this basic guide. And this basic guide. Now, add in regular human adults who are used to getting their ass kissed by every gym membership person ever and expect us to do the same. I cannot tell you how many dumb ass emails and conversations I have on the phone every single day.
I could understand if we didn’t put almost everything we wanted you to know online. Our schedule? You couldn’t find our class times hidden under the tab Frequently Asked Questions OR Getting Started? Really? Did you even look? Our membership prices? Again cleverly hidden under Frequently Asked Questions AND Payment! How crafty of us! Where are we located? Maybe check the tab Our Location. Woah, now it’s just getting crazy! Are you from out-of-town and want to drop in? Surely this is again hidden in the labyrinth that is our website.
weird how I can even read this text on my iPhone
I know, maybe it’s your first time on this crazy thing called the information superhighway, or in layman’s terms da interwebz. Let me help you out. If you are reading this, you are currently on the world wide web (www is short for this). If there is something you can hover over with your mouse and it changes color it is called a hyperlink. If you click on that with your mouse, it will take you to a place with more information about that subject. Feel free to thank Al Gore for inventing this place.
Maybe you are old school. Maybe you just drove up here. I wish there were several signs up with information about our place. Signs that said: Private Gym-No Soliciting-No Small Talk-No Gawking-No Excuses-Just Results; Box Closed Mon-Fri from 12pm-3pm-No Walk In Tours-No First Time Walk In Free Trails; Non-Members Must Use Office Door ONLY; a sign with the schedule of class times. I wish we had signs like that up, and I wish they were in this thing called print. Print is like cursive, but without all the squiggly lines. Oh wait, we fucking do.
But I forgot that you are a beautiful and unique snowflake and none of this shit applies to you because you are special and can do what you want. You are why I am a fucking asshole.
So, to wrap it all up. I think it is dumb that some people make you take off your shoes when you come over to their house. My shoes aren’t dirty. Your floors are not that nice and/or your carpet isn’t that clean. But guess what? If I go over there, I abide by the rules that person has in their own house. Maybe if you did the same when you came here I wouldn’t be such an asshole. And if you don’t like it? Well don’t come over.
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Great Manifesto
You know what really grinds my gears….hahaha love it. Also if people are getting hurt its probably because A) they don’t mobilize at ALL B) they have no damn clue how to do the movements properly.
You mean you are one of the few boxes that actually TEACH people?! How I wish I could be there. I have been to and taught in a few boxes that are basicallly cheerleaders. I will have to stop mid-wod to save some poor little old lady or high school kid from destryoing their back or hips during some movement. This is by far my favorie CF article!
Hell I will be up there probably in september (I used to live in waldorf) I will be sure to read everything before I come in!
Nice read…I bet you’re actually a really nice guy.
What you say is true about too many facets of American society – educators, businessmen and women, the workforce, the unemployed, politicians, the rich, the poor, adults, children – lazy, disrespectful, self-entitled and unable to follow directions. Your CrossFit box is a mirror of society. I congratulate you on being an asshole.
dummies should read this as well before commenting
Click to access CFJ_Silverman_Assholes.pdf
Hello,
My name is Vicente Zarate, for the people in my gym I´m Coach Vic. We run CrossFit Merida in the mexican Mayan Peninsula. I am the biggest asshole in my gym, wouldn´t have it any other way.
Thanks for the manifesto. I am a 100% with you.
You have a friend in Merida, Yucatan, Mexico.
ViC
Hola vicente, me puedes dar la direccion y telefono de tu box?, tienes xfit para niños? Vivo en San Antonio, TX. Pero tenemos intenciones de mudarnos a Merida.
Gracias
I LOVED this article. From one asshole to another, I salute you 🙂
you shoes are dirty, let’s be real.
You RULE!!!!!
I really liked your statements up to the part you said about the cancer spreading remark. I feel it is in poor taste and choice of wording due to the fact people have the REAl deal Cancer and my husband happens to be a Cancer pt. Who was very fit and athletic up until Dec 2012, when he was diagnosed. So please use better or diffrent terminology.
Butt-hurt
Really? wow! dick.
While your current situation is definitely unfortunate and I wish him the best, no one was talking about cancer patients.
I’m sorry to hear about your husbands cancer. Your husband doesn’t want to have cancer and yet without treatment (ie surgery, chemo, radiation) it would likely spread. The original poster was using a metaphor to explain a point not making a negative statement about cancer patients or your husband.
dear person – I liked what you wrote until I didn’t. please take only make feelings into consideration when you write a post not intended for me.
with love,
no coping skills
OMG! We can never talk about Cancer again, or use it in a sentence. Fuck it let’s not talk about lazy people either, because my sister, mother, brother, friend, so and so is lazy and I’m offended. Get a fucking grip snow flake! BUTT HURT!
Nah, Cathy’s on to something. I currently have metastatic cancer. On my mind every freakin’ day – but I’ve got ways to manage balance. So I’m reading this great, well written, funny article and loving it – and all of a sudden the word cancer appears. No lie, I get an immediate visceral reaction. It is only a second, but it sucks. I actually had to go back and read the sentence again to get the meaning – I was that thrown off track. I think what she might mean is that it is actually really weird to get blindsided by the word – even if it is used quite benignly. Especially in an article where you are not expecting it. You’re right, it’s clearly meant here as a “lazy disease” but I swear, I still walk away appreciating, but with a nervous stomach. L.
I had cancer. It was difficult and scary. It’s a horrible disease no one wants. However, I was not offended by that statement at all. It is a description.
I’m also an affiliate owner. I am very empathetic with my athletes, especially the ones who try their best and work hard. There is behavior however, that you do not want to see in your box. While behavior might not spread like cancer, it affects everyone and there are some things/behavior we are better off not tolerating. I think it’s a good analogy. Everyone knows cancer is bad. I’m sorry about your husband and anyone else fighting cancer, but focus on fighting. The day you are diagnosed is the day you become a survivor!
Give me a break!! He used the correct word and in the correct context! If you would take a moment to look up the word “cancer” and read the defintion, you will see that it can have several uses within the English language.
” 3 : something evil or malignant that spreads destructively .”
This one has nothing to do with the horrible biological disease!!!
Are you offended by the word “bitch?”
If you are around a lot of dog people, they use that word all the time to talk about female dogs.
Where it is understandable to be sensitive and feel helpless (to whatever degree,I know how it is to feel like you can’t fix them) about your husband’s condition (I have family that have died and are fighting cancer ( brain, breast and Lymphoma)) just because uses a word that you are sensitive to doesn’t doesn’t mean it was wrong and insensitive.
(standing ovation) You Sir are a MAN!!
Second!!
So a man is someone who has little to no patience or awareness for the different types of people out there. Someone who whines and cries about others sounds a lot like a kid to me. So glad I never had this person in my life growing up or even now for that manner. Grow up and ask some women what a real man is like!! Some people who are decent at Crossfit and listen well in general would be more apt to not listen to this person, like me.
I can see where you’re coming from and understand your frustrations. But I must say that you have made me THAT much more thankful for the coaches that I have at my gym. They are a little more level-headed and patient. In reference to your “PEOPLE ARE LAZY” section… Not everyone who enters a gym for the first time is motivated, and often need some help from coaches to drive them out of their mental rut and laziness. To me, it sounds like YOU are being lazy in that you just want everyone who joins your gym to be excited and ready to hit the ground running. But that’s not the case with everyone. A lot of people who are over-weight and feeling down about themselves have to be coaxed by friends to join. And that is a great opportunity as a coach to build them up mentally and physically, and enjoy watching their progress as they begin to NOT feel lazy anymore!
Butt-hurt
I totally agree with you. One reason, the main reason actually, that I do not do Cross Fit is because I am 36 years old with absolutely no workout/fitness experience in my life. I am not fat, but I am very out of shape and know nothing about the different movements and such.
I was made to feel like I was lazy and stupid because I had to ask questions and so forth.
I want to become fit and in shape, but I am not paying some ass hat to insult me just because I need a little extra help learning this stuff for the first time.
Travis, you need to try a different box. I have athletes who started out 100 lbs overweight. They asked questions but they always had a good attitude and tried their best. I don’t care if it takes someone 30 seconds to do a burpee if that is their best performance and they keep trying.
There are however, people who like to have side conversations about other stuff while the coach is teaching movement, then talk about why they can’t do the movement or what they think they should be doing, and then make excuses about why they didn’t try. Usually I can draw those people out and change them, but if they are too difficult I can’t. It takes time away from other athletes who also deserve attention.
If you are one of the many people willing to try and just need some extra help go try a different place. It’s like the girlfriend/doctor analogy. Don’t give up!!! If you are near San Clemente CA come see us at BeachFit CrossFit.
I can’t stop laughing, that is one of the funniest things I have read in a long time!!
Your Sir are a Scholar and Tune Smith!!!! I preach what you just said daily, and usually have a discussion with somebody about someone who was offended because they are thin skinned, sensitive and can’t handle when the truth is given to them…. If you don’t like the way the truth sounds when you hear it, then change your life or shut the fuck up and go be unhappy away from us happy people.
Yes, because you sound incredibly happy.
LOVE IT! There are many flavors of kool-aid, so stick to your flavor, and those that want it… they’ll never leave. Those that want another flavor… more power to them, but it’s not here and this is NOT Burger King… you’re NOT getting it your way 😀
That was a lovely breath of fresh air! Nicely put.
“If you don’t like the way the truth sounds when you hear it, then change your life or shut the fuck up and go be unhappy away from us happy people.”
What? Happy? you sound anything but happy…too angry and narcissistic to think that there are very very happy people that do not think like you
Butt-hurt
butt-muncher
How old are you Jon? I mean really.
not to be rude or anything but seeing as to how you have written this on a lot of the comments, it may do you well to learn the definition of “butt-hurt”
I like long walks on the beach too!!! Moonbeams and butterfly are pretty sa-weet as well.
Yeah I definitely wouldn’t be happy at your box. You can be a great coach AND be kind, respectful & encouraging to people all at the same time.
maybe krawsfit can offer a kindness cert soon, I would definitely pay $600 to take it and get kindness certified.
epic response!!!
OK, read your blog and many of the responses to it. One of the biggest things I took from your writings is that you are an asshole to those who deserve it, not to everyone. Just the idiots, whiners, armchair quarterbacks (many of whom have replied here), hanky stompers, and thin skinned tools who are easily offended by anything that doesn’t fit in with their narrow view of how the world should work (to their benefit, of course). I’m sure that those who are coming to your box or who approach you in a decent manner (i.e. NOT in the middle of a WOD) for help or information are treated with decency and respect. Kindness is NOT a right. It must be earned just like respect.
WIN!
maybe you can instead take a course on running a business and interacting with other human beings in a manner that doesn’t leave everyone thinking “what a douchebag”. If you don’t think this rant will hurt your reputation, you know even less about business than I gave you credit for (hint: it wasn’t much)
for Ben: it won’t hurt his business at all. for the haters: he obviously just doesn’t cater to you & people like you… and that’s okay!! why should he change himself & his gym & his business for you & others?? he’s in business to do it his way. don’t worry, there’s a shit ton of other crossfit gyms, find one you like, it’s that easy. don’t like him?? don’t go his gym. and why are you here on his blog anyway??
😂😂😂
Butt-hurt
What is Butt-hurt and why do you keep posting it? It’s annoying
LOVE IT!!! she must not have read the post that she is posting about!
I couldn’t agree more!
Big words from a gym that didn’t make regionals in a weaker area. Sounds like you are a great coach.
that one stings!
1)please tell me more about how you were an important part (head coach/lead programmer/top athlete) of a regionals team in a “tough” region
2)if the mid-atlantic is so weak why were Ben Smith AND Nate Schrader in the top 12 last year at the games? Likewise with Christy Phillips last year? How about two years ago at the games-Smith, Schrader, and Hendel all in the top 12 as well as Phillips, Glitterberger, and Conzelman. totally weak region.
I never said I was any of that but I’m not the one acting like a tool bag. Also lets talk less on the region and more on the fact that your gym didn’t make regionals with your top programing and amazing coaching for serious athletes only.
weird how the title of this blog is “on being an asshole” and I admit to being an asshole. no where above does it say-I am the best programmer/coach in the world, better than OPT, Rudy Neilson, CJ Martin, Pendlay, and Rip combined. are you better at reading or crossfit?
You need to add a facebook ‘like’ button so I can, you know, ‘like.’
defensive much?
Seems like your core personality coming through. I bet you were a weakling when you were a kid – probably why you try to be a bully now.
@Aaron & Ben, couldn’t agree more. The whole premise of this guys post is how much more he knows about coaching then others, then deflects when the subject rolls around to his lack of results. I’d say he’s “butt-hurt” over something and is lashing out by being an all out cunt.
Butt-hurt
You are fucking awesome. If u are ever in nj and want to train, come to guerrilla fitness. We understand you. -fellow asshole.
Abajiev lifted 120 kg snatch and 150kg CJk @ 67.5kg back in 1957, sure people today might lift more but no one has coached better, your philiosphy in general blows donkey balls!
not sure what that has to do with anything. but I would totally let that old dude coach me or my athletes up and drop knowledge if bad ass world renowned olympic lifting coaches dropped by the box on the reg.
LOL! I’m new to CrossFit. This article made me smile (and blush). …now I’m trying to figure out if “blows donkey balls” is a compliment??? 😉
Great read man! Tough love and blunt! You say a lot of the things I want to.
AMEN to all that – LOVE It!!! No need for sugar-coating.
Although there is much truth to this, it could have been written with a little more tact. And if you’re going to insult people, you should at least learn how to spell.
dat spelin iz oovoraded
I must have missed something. I’m generally pretty anal about things like spelling and grammar and I didn’t see anything wrong. And, my two cents worth to Susie from Texas (written before I read this comment), read my post below about “…could have been written with more tact.”
Brian Bills, there is a mispelled word the very first sentence.
Would be interesting to see if this is good marketing or bad. Anybody who pays to be insulted is a fool to do so. Anyone who expects to be paid while insulting is usually a greater fool. Interesting article. The truth can be inspiring and uplifting, or the truth can turn you away. I suspect you have turned more away than gained but none the less, as a business owner myself it is marvelous to watch.
he’s not insulting his client/members of the gym, they do not do the things he speaks of 😛 he is speaking about the “others” that just show up, call in, email, want this, want that, want it now even though he’s busy and they are asking questions that are already listed on his website.
MOST crossfit gyms are not like a globo gym. we don’t have a receptionist, a front desk girl, or a sales rep to take a “prospect” by the hand & coddle them & answer their million questions… we are too busy running a “mom & pop” type joint and working closely with our 15-20 people classes of our already paying members… so we have very limited time for someone who doesn’t know what they want or if they even want to join.
Money & Business (since so many are bringing it up), is about keeping YOUR clientele happy, it’s NOT about keeping everyone happy. His clients love him and that is all that matters. if YOU need/want a lot of attention, just go to a bigger gym that has a person 24/7 who can answer all your questions.
Asshole
One of the best blog posts I have read in quite some time. Keep it up.
Hi,
“I’m dropping into the area and was wondering how far your gym is from our hotel. Also, can you tell us how to get there?”
From,
An affiliate owner that totally gets this post.
Sometimes when you are travelling it can be quite hard to get internet access to research everything so more often than not people would call the service provider. Great service you would give. Welcome to the crossfit “community”
why don’t you check the gym BEFORE you leave on your trip?? that’s what I do every time I travel. hell, you plan your other activities ahead of time… why wouldn’t you plan out your gym attendance since you know how different crossfit is from a globo gym??
Exactly Thea. I travel quite a bit and Crossfit gyms are notorious for being pretty friendly, but horrible at answering their email or the phone. One lady who answered her phone couldn’t even tell me where the gym was located (I am not joking). You can’t have it both ways Mo: website with full info and means by which we can reach out in an instant communication world, but then also want the customer to operate as if it is the 1980’s planning our trips 100% ahead of time like Chevy Chase in Lampoons Vacation.
Just answer the fuckin’ question, businessman.
funny seeing you here Casey 😀 -Monique; I wish I had a dollar for every time I answered a question via email from someone who got my email from the website (auto contact form) and is asking a question about Prices (which are listed), Schedule (which is listed), or “what do we do” (yup, listed)… seriously, in this day & age…. do you seriously still have to ask “what is crossfit?”… seriously….
whoa whoa whoa, you mean people are actually interested and asking about a business/service you have advertised for? That is amazing. Here is a good tid-bit to learn, people have various communication styles. Sure, customers are stupid, working in customer service is frustrating. Guess what, when you open a gym (whether you call it a box doesn’t matter) customer service is part of that.
There is establishing a culture of the gym (which is what the OP above is doing) then just bitching about doing your job. Like you might tell your clients during a WOD, suck it up and tough up.
awesome!
Not impressed at all with this person. There are ways to express yourself and make a point without this type of language and I’m not just talking about the swearing. I would not attend this box because I’d fear he would go out of business since he’s obviously doens’t have good business sense.
Spoken like a true JV high school athlete that is now trying to be the best at working out.
Hahahahaha
Like
hey hey hey-i totally have a varsity letter
lol this was amazing…sounds like all the people complaining are the lazy fucks that are cheating themselves…cudos…
Always listen to the outspoken tough talk guy in the gym too, they’ll lead you to the promised land of radical fitness. Go you rad guy, tell those people how it be!
I found your rambling diatribe to be politically incorrect, insensitive and offensive by the standards of today’s civilized society. In short, I FUCKING LOVED IT!!! If more people in this world took this kind of attitude when dealing with the self-centered, entitled jerkoffs that many of us deal with on a regular basis then perhaps they might start getting the hint and put their hankies away so the rest of us could get something accomplished.
and you sound like the last 3 people I fired from my real world job, because they lacked the tact to work effectively with others. You’re probably unemployed and lack a college degree.
more likely he runs his own business, does it his way, doesn’t answer to anyone, takes time off when he wants & for as long as he wants, and enjoys the fuck out of his life 😀 which is why he keeps doing it his way.
Your gay.
Nice to hear someone speak plainly for a change. I totally agree with you. So many people are afraid to talk like that in order not to offend someone. If I were closer (I’m in Arkansas), I’d come visit you box. Of course I would come 30 minutes early and call first…. 🙂
Word
I love you. Please marry me. From one CrossFit box owner to another. Awesome.
Love the post and the attitude! I don’t understand why anyone is upset over this. What happened to “Honesty is the best policy”? If what was written hurts their feelings then maybe they should look at why. Also, you are entitled to say/write whatever you want. If they don’t like it, they should quit reading your blog.
OMG I just had an orgasm reading this….so much so I am going to post it on my box’s website so everyone can have an orgasm too! Gosh you have said everything I have said to my partner as to why I am the way I am….he thinks I am a “lady asshole” and I AM, but now I have found an asshole just like me!!!! YOU ARE THE ONE!!!!!!! LMFAO!!!! AWESOME READ, thank you for sharing and I will be sure to do the same 🙂
I agree with Susie. While a lot of what you said does hold true, this is one of the most uncouth articles I have ever read. And you really, really should reevaluate your segment on the military. Do you have any idea the time and effort military docs have put into the training regimen? You probably don’t, because you’ve never served. But just for piece of mind, why dont you take a look at this:
Click to access special-operations-nutrition-guide.pdf
PS – Next time try not so sound like every other self-righteous prick from MD, and keep in mind that there are plenty of people out there that are much bigger, faster, and stronger than you.
Colin, I’ve been serving for 19 years and I can emphatically state, SCREW the military’s training methods! They do everything in under the sun to destroy the human body. Pushups that ruin your rotator cuffs, situps that screw up your spine, running for days on end that wipes out your knees. And, to make things worse, their “new and improved” training and warm up routines look more like something Richard Simmons came up with. Are you aware that some soldiers leaving basic training are failing their APFT (fitness test for you civilians) at the first opportunity when they get to their irst duty station? Yeah, Colin, tell me about how great the military’s fitness program is and DON’T try to hold up the SEALs program as the standard. That is for the guys who are the best of the bes of the best and not the program for the average Joe.
Yes, our PT program is..ok but like anything it can be improved as long as the participants are willing. Cant tell you how many times Ive been banned from leading a session. LOL. Great response to Colin.
Not sure about the rest of the services (and I’m 100% certain the following doesn’t apply to the SOF elements), but the Army physical fitness “regimen” is a joke and ultimately a waste of time. I love the days when I can skip PT and do a real workout in my garage. Army PT barely qualifies as the most basic level of fitness. I can cease all strenuous activity for the next six months and still easily pass an Army PT test. Not exactly a lofty standard. Regardless, 99% of military personnel “get in shape” by following commands and orders to do exercises, not by understanding why they’re doing it and they sure as shit don’t understand nutrition, otherwise the Burger King and Popeye’s on Fort Hood wouldn’t be packed all day, every day. So the author’s point rings true when he says most military personnel aren’t fitness experts at all and you’d be better served to listen to coaches and actual experts with real fitness educations.
With leadership like this, it will fail. Be careful, someone else will come up behind you and lead the way to another fitness craze but built on true strength and positive approaches.
You sound like a dick. But you admit to being one so I guess that is your business model. Good luck with that.
LOL you are a total douchebag. Wow. Not sure whether to give you a standing ovation for your melodramatic narcisissm or punch you in the head. Must be tough being you… such a self-proclaimed hardass who’s poop doesn’t stink, and being surrounded by people who actually expect you to *gasp* TRAIN THEM!!!! OMG. Please, shut down your box because you are a dick and should not be interfacing with people. Ever.
Two thumbs up.
2 more thumbs up.
two more thumbs up
Ditto.
So true. I don’t think you needed to be more “tactful”, it’s your blog, say what you want how you want to… people make the decision to read it. I would hate to be a member of a gym where someone just yells “Go” and never bothers to correct form or watch my performance on a WOD. Additionally, I prefer being around likeminded people who want to work hard and push me to my limits.
focking aweeesome. fuking period.
Nice post man. Though I don’t agree with EVERYTHING such as being mean to people on the phone or those who drop in asking dumb questions (though it does drive me a little crazy when people ask me about rates, schedule, location etc when it’s all on the website) this is pretty good. You make a lot of great points and it bothers me that some gyms will bend over backwards to cater to everyone just to bring in large amounts of business. I co-own HIGHBAR CrossFit in Ashburn, VA and we have a very strict program in place that requires self discipline and accountability, as well as hard work. The members we want are the ones who WANT to be there. We disagree with some things CrossFit does and those things we don’t practice. If someone has a problem with it, go to another gym. If someone doesn’t want to work hard, don’t complain when you don’t see results. If someone wants to come workout, eat shitty outside of the gym, then ask why they’re performance isn’t getting better, get a clue. After all, you wouldn’t piss in your gas tank and expect your car to make it too far would you? Luckily so far we have a great group who all work hard and are seeing great results.
Feel free to stop by our gym any time bud. Doors are always open to you.
Yet another business that I will spread the word to my family in MD to not go to. Thanks for exposing yourself, douche.
Wow, ok. Thanks for the heads up. Though it seems you may have missed the point of my comment on this, mainly the part about me stating I don’t agree with everything in the post. I’m not mean or rude to people who come in. So far I haven’t encountered any of the people he speaks of in this post, though I’m sure they’re out there and they will come in. Hopefully they learn to work hard and will fit right in. I’m glad there are people out there however who believe they can judge a gym by one comment. I respect all of my clients and make sure everyone gets what they need. Everyone is very happy and seeing huge results, so hmmm I’m guessing we’re doing something right. Keep on trolling though.
And for the record, I am in no way an asshole. I am a good coach and I enjoy helping people, as do my business partners. Don’t be so quick to judge and assume. Remember the ASS is U not ME. 🙂
why is he a douche? his post was clean…. oh… I see…. you’re a troll & have nothing better to do
You’re the one who posted in support of this douche. “Feel free to stop by our gym any time bud. Doors are always open to you.”
Therefore your business ( HIGHBAR CrossFit in Ashburn, VA) s the one I will tell my 3 dozen MD/VA relatives to avoid along with this person.
See how business works? Or did you think all referrals are good?
Ok so because I supported some things he said and left the door open to him, I’m a bad coach, business owner and run a shitty gym? Oh ok. Honestly I don’t give a shit if you tell your 3 dozen friends (omg my business will fail now) about your opinion of us. All our members are happy, we are a good gym, we have great programming, and a good approach to coaching ( I wonder if that’s why we’re growing so fast). If you have a problem with us expecting self discipline and accountability out of our members, then that’s a fault on your end. Everyone who has goals and wants to reach them can only get them if they are responsible and work hard, and that’s a fact. We only have them an hour a day and can only do so much. Like i said, go ahead and tell your 3 dozen friends in MD and VA. You really just come off as an angry man. Actually, why don’t you stop in some time so I can prove you wrong. Doors are open to you as well friend. Our doors are open to everyone.
So what do ya say Ben? Come in and try us out to challenge your opinion, or are you just going to assume you’re right?
Does he need to notify you at least 24 hours ahead of time and show up 30 mins early?
I agree, you pat the author on the back for his horrible attitude. I too will spread the word to avoid your box.
People do the same thing with DJ’s. Everyone’s an expert. Well said.
LOL! What a moron. I will save you the trouble: “…butt-hurt”
Truth! At the end of the day, it is all predicated on one thing: Choice. If you choose to whine and bitch and moan, go right ahead. My 43 year old ass will be doing 135lb hanging power cleans and running 1000 meter repeats while you choose to sulk and stuff your gullet. Choose activity. Choose better food. Choose to MOVE to a better, healthier life. Or, perhaps you CHOOSE to remain where you are.
Exactly. I love when people say “oh I’m not ready for that” or “I’m too old”. My 60 year old mother comes to my gym. She doesn’t make excuses. What’s the next one?
This is funny. Thanks for a laugh
Ha! Whine, whine, whine… “I want everything to be easy,” “I want everyone to listen to me.” Running a business is hard, tough guy…get used to it.
TRUTH! Things that many box owners and/or coaches have to deal with on the regular, and it frustrates them to no end!! Sure, we only bitch about it amongst ourselves, but funny to see on the interwebz for all others to basically read and say “AMEN”. We definitely can’t be the answer to everyones’ problems. I definitely liked the part of the ACL injury in HS that still limits you, but I think I get more of “I hurt my back a few years ago, so I can’t do ______ (insert fundamental movement)”.
As far as stupid emails go, one of my coaches received one from the husband of an on-ramp student who tried to “inform” on how to teach people and run our box just because he was a kinesio major 30 years ago, and made all the way to being a HS football coach today! It was so hilarious that we read it aloud as a WOD to give our students an ab workout! (not really, but it could have…)
If you’ve never had a back injury, you should definitely shut the fuck up. You have no idea how painful it is to not be able to move or walk. As someone who has a slipped L5 lumbar disc I can personally attest to the pain it causes.
Try a little empathy, you pile of shit.
Ben… I definitely have empathy for all my clients, and my coaches and/or myself ask them to LIST EVERY INJURY IN DETAIL THEY HAVE EVER HAD, before even setting foot into the ON-RAMP class, on their liability form! This is our guide to knowing what we can ask them to do, or not do. If people tell me they have broken their back, have had herniated/slipped disks, etc. then I tailor workouts accordingly. Our liability disclosure also states that you are in good health without any medical conditions that allows you to engage in strenous exercise. People read this and sign it! I don’t hold a gun to their head!
Of the people that have said “oh, I hurt my back…”, and then I ask them what kind of injury it was, it has been on the order of “i tweaked it picking up a heavy box months ago” or not even an injury, just “chronic back pain” (from having a weak back and poor posture). Case in point, one gentleman had been in a horrible bicycle accident, where he was hit by a car. He is a general contractor and has worked construction for over 20 years, yet, after the accident he suffered chronic back pain. When he came in, he told me his past injuries and we worked with him. He started off only deadlifting 95#. One year later, his chronic back pain is gone, and he deadlifts over 400#. If you are going to come on here and insult to make yourself feel better, then that’s a sad life you live buddy. All that Crabcakes was saying from the start are that people seem to have this self-entitlement that everyone should stop what they are doing, and cater to their every whim, even before they are a client! As box owners, we can’t be playing favorites or catering to a select few because then other students don’t get to same level of instruction. Sure, Crabcakes might have swung the pendulum to a super extreme side, but we have ALL been there and that’s the support we are voicing for him. Not all CF boxes are the same, not all coaches are the same, but don’t be so quick to vilify him. I’m sure he could solve 99% of his frustrations if he just got a person to answer phones and work the front desk/answer questions/etc.
And for the record, I have had a back injury (pinched sciatic) earlier during in my CrossFit training from bumping up too quickly on Deadlifts one day. I could barely walk or even lean forward for that matter. It took multiple acupuncture treatments, rest, and rehabilitation of the lower back to get to where I was prior to my injury, and past it, after I recovered. If anything, I learned what not to do, and I can pass that information along to my students too. I could have easily said “no, I can’t deadlift more than 135# now because I hurt my back once.”
See? You assumed again, and now come off as more ignorant and just negative in general. Stop trolling this post and get to work before you get fired by your boss for timecard fraud.
Ben,
Sounds like you never had to work for anything. Seems like you enjoy being keyboard warrior from what I observe from your comments. Crabcakes is not a douche. He is expressing his frustration that he deals with everyday. I myself have Cerebral Palsy and was born hemiplegic, don’t know what that means? Look it up bro. I am a CF-L1 trainer at a box in Los Angeles and I know my coach will agree (along with other renowned coaches I personally work with) that Sir Crabcakes has the proper attitude toward his business. I would to love to work with Crabcakes and possibly TruBruin25. I know which box to visit once if I’m ever in Maryland now.
Imagine having a life-long disorder and fighting your way to deadlift, squat, box jump, sit up. I have large numbers for all my (accessory) lifts. Numbers don’t matter in my argument. Now imagine someone telling you, when you have a neurological disorder that they don’t want to squat to parallel because their knees hurt. Not to mention that because of your disorder, you have acquire injuries like chronic patella tendonitis, snapping shoulders and hips, and immobility. Do you know how annoying it is to reeducate someone who is highly misinformed? I may not understand how Crabcakes feels about business because I don’t own one, but I do sympathize with his frustration about people who whine and complain. Let me say as a crippled, I can’t do double unders, but I sure as hell can teach it. I can’t snatch, but I do understand the biomechanics of the movement and can teach it.
So anytime you want to find humility with me, I will gladly spend time with you. Lastly, I want to add that I know my athletes love/hate my programming, because they’re tough WODs that challenge them as well as get them stronger. Enjoy your life with your weak mind and body.
Your next door Crippled CrossFit Trainer 🙂
Ben your clearly a moron, you have not only missed the point of the article by a sizeable degree, and I think in response to your “comment” I think it is fair to say…Butt-Hurt…
I have had an L4 / L5 disc operation and guess what?…listening to my coaches and crossfitting properly actually helped me get better and now no pain….holy shit right? no way..and if you are really that sensitive about something someone you don’t know wrote?..as we say in Australia “harden the fuck up mate” #firstworldproblems….#seriouslycuntgetagrip….#butthurt..
This is the longest rant that I’ve read in a while. I hope this makes you feel better. http://instagram.com/shimejiwasabi/#
Thanks for the shout out.
Hahahaha! This is the only comment that made me laugh. Thanks.
so…can i drop in this evening or what?
At our box, the owners/coaches/staff are potentially the most tough, rough bunch you ever saw. Cops, firefighters, really tough dudes. However, they are able to accomplish all of the rule following, tough standards methodology that are being espoused in this blog article, without “being an asshole”. Justifying being rough, rude and crude to others is just that…. Justification. It is not necessary to coaching or running a Box. And I would never spend a dime working out in a Box like the one that is apparently being described in this blog article. (I have never been to Southern Maryland Crossfit.) Is it not friendly there? No problem! You dont get my money. Period. You have a right to require high standards of your paying clients. But not with a “fuck you” attitude. The rest of this nonsense is your own personal aggressive psychological problem. I would seek help somewhere for that. Crossfit should be fun. If youre not having fun, youre doing something else. Military boot camp carry-over, possibly ? I love my Box, love the staff, and the entire group of 150 people are clients there. None of the hard ass BS youre describing.
Soo… To sum it up…. We’re supposed to not listen to any other athletic clubs, just you..cause you’re right, and they’re wrong…
Soo… Basically, you ARE the guy that you’re talking about not listening to?
Your “honesty” shows how much you hate your life…. Mean people, opps sorry, “honest assholes” are people who are crusty about everything.. They hate their life, so they want to make everyone’s life miserable.
Glad you posted this crap. This is one place I’ll never darken the door of.
Get some help there “sunshine”… Not everyone’s life is a miserable as yours, Tubs.
You sound like a terrible business person. You entirely lack tact, and you show zero respect for your clients. You sound like a typical muscle-head asshole who hates people but needs to pay his bills so he uses the one limited skill set he has while not bothering to learn how to be a professional.
I will sum up your entire post with a simple sentence: You demand respect from others without bothering to respect anyone.
Contrary to the old adage, the customer is not always right. But the customer ALWAYS deserves your respect, and this entire post can and should be the downfall of your business.
I found your lack of professionalism and demeaning tone to be entirely unprofessional and I hope to see you fail.
I’ll sum up your post in one sentence –
nobody fucking cares
Hope to see him fail? That’s just bad karma.
you’ll fail along with him. You know, at HIGHBAR CrossFit in Ashburn, VA since you support his attitude.
This is kind of the tough space in Crossfit. You have your gym and ostensibly it’s for training people AND
making money (or maybe your box doesn’t generate revenue? I don’t know). The hard-ass attitude definitely works for people who want to get serious about their lifting and Met-Cons, etc. However, there is a large percentage of people working out at CF that don’t respond to that and just want to get fit. Follow the rules – yes, learn proper technique – absolutely! Listen to the coaches cues and don’t get butt-hurt – yes. But it’s ok to be kind, it’s ok to be patient, it’s ok to work with people who maybe aren’t the brightest or strongest or most motivated – IF you want to make money at this. Or maybe your bros pay enough to make the bills. Either way…
crabcakesncrossfit,
I read your entire post ON YOUR BLOG! And I read all the comments about YOUR BLOG POST about YOUR GYM. What I found most humorous is those that opposed vs those that liked it. It’s clear what kinda guy you probably are based on your post. And Ive worked with hundreds a lot like you. Hell, I can be like that at times too. But as Brian said, I’m willing to bet if a guy or gal came into your Box (I cant say that with a straight face….LOL) and seeked coaching and mentoring I’m sure you would do just that, coach and mentor. And after a few sessions they would soon see whether your Box/style is for them or maybe they need to find another place to try Crossfit. To each his own I always say. Your blog, speak how you wish. And to the people that don’t like you or your assholeness…hey this is America and they have a choice. Go to your gym or go elsewhere. My bet is those that didnt like what you said probably wouldnt fit into your Box anyway (thats what she said…LOL). Thrusters suck and for a good time call Fran. 😉
I’m pretty sure he could fit 100 men in his box.
I’m also pretty sure that’s a typical Thursday night for him.
Dude is probably good at his job, just burnt out! We experience it in our professional lives. Bottom line, if you don’t kiss a little ass, your box will close eventually. Hope it works out for you, but I doubt you have enough people to sustain a box indefinitely with the “my way, or the highway” mentality. Hope I am wrong, but probably not.
Good Luck, you will need it to stay afloat.
You should re-read your post and look at the level of hypocrisy within it. You are lamenting the laziness of others and their fitness regimen, but are in turn being lazy about being a better box owner, coach, motivator, etc. You are accepting being an a-hole (it is what it is) instead of challenging yourself to be better. This is what CrossFit is all about being better at life, not just fitness….
very well said, and an apt observation.
Agreed
Whining and complaining about whiners and complainers….
Funny world we live in.
No, marry me! Fabulously written.
And this is why people roll their eyes when you mention Crossfit. Instead of it being inclusive and a place to better yourself, this is how people view it. Kudos, douchebag on setting CF back a few years. I have been doing CF for about 10 months and I was so nervous when I first went in that I would encounter people like you. I didn’t know how to lift…I didn’t know form, I couldn’t do pullups or rope climbs. The coaches at my box worked with me and put me at ease….now I can do all that stuff and I am proud of myself and proud of my box. Had I walked in that first day and encountered someone like you I would have never returned and never invited friends and family members who have since turned their lives around. So keep being a douche and maybe you will attract all the other people like you and you can be confined to one box instead of infecting the rest of us.
Amen!
At least you have a bunch of men wanting to marry you now. So uh, well done. Might wanna move to CA so you can do it legally.
See.. it is stupid posts like this that show your true colors, you bigot! If you were as educated as your wish to portray yourself to be, you would know that MD allowed same-sex marriage before CA, which just was passed. And anticipating what your defense will be to my post, no I’m not gay. But, at least I read the news and know what is going on in my own country, and support everyone’s views and decisions, because it is their own!
WTF! I’m not a man. You can marry me legally, anywhere overthere in the land of dreams.
Sounds like you need to hire a receptionist – you know, a professional at dealing with people. Then you should probably look into that whining thing because you’ve got it bad. Waa, people ask questions. Waa, people are interested in what we’re doing. Waa, my website sucks.
Wow, a lot of loose butthole comments on here. Whether or not we are aware of it, every business owner makes the decision that they are going to: 1. work with anyone and everyone, collect the money, and likely be miserable, or 2. they are going to work with like-minded people, collect considerably less money in the near term, and most likely be ridiculously happy. #1 pays the bills, but kills the soul. It takes balls to choose #2, because #2 is a sure way to starve while building your business in the short run. But it’s also the only way to ensure a rewarding work life in the long run.
Stick to your guns. Some people, like me, need a foot in their ass from time to time. They will find your gym, and you both will be happy. The others will migrate to another gym, and will find mutual happiness elsewhere.
“Some people, like me, need a foot in their ass from time to time”
I’m sure you pay good money for that, too. I’m pretty sure that service is available at this crossfit too, so you’re in luck.
Not a bad article but you should have used spell check, but grammar and spelling might not be important to an asshole.
By the way – there’s more to life than fitness. Shocking, I realize.
Your assertion that people who aren’t in peak physical condition are lazy & don’t work hard is a fallacy.
They don’t work hard at physical fitness. That doesn’t mean anything other than that. I know several heavyset people who are executives, software developers, engineers, architects – demanding jobs that require them to work long hours, so they can’t all spend time in your uh, box.
Just a little food for thought, since you’re clearly so incapable of empathy or real world vision.
Go ahead & call the whole world fat lazy slobs who don’t work hard. See how much business that brings you.
Considering the article can’t cover everything on either side of the issues, taking it for what it is at this level and length, there are many fair points made. So many socially acceptable rules need to be updated, especially on how people handle the truth and “my house, my rules”. Of course to each their own. There’s many ways to be fit and each person should find what they enjoy that is safe and successful for them. Overall, this is a very reasonable article.
Except it’s not a house. It’s a business. One that allegedly provides a service to its customers.
And a service oriented business can only fail with a “my house, my rules” philosophy.
That said, if this douche had any real world skills he’d probably be making real money working a 9-5 like all the people he’s whining about instead of smelling sweaty socks all day making minimum wage as a trainer.
Ben,
You are the #1 commenter on my blog of all time! I just checked the stats! Sorry, but I will not marry you. Thanks for all the insightful, angry comments though. Since you are a super successful person who runs their own business I will take ALL of your comments under advisement. I would like to come back to all of your comments but I am too busy reading emails, text messages, and direct messages from actual business and or affiliate/gym owners that thought this was post was awesome as fuck. Here is one come back for you though. This is from Joe Gold, founder of a small chain you may have heard of called Gold’s Gym:
“To keep it simple run your gym like you run your house. Keep it clean and in good running order. No jerks allowed. Members pay on time, and if they give you any crap, throw them out. There’s peace where there’s order.
I agree with most of your article. But opening up a crossfit box has got to be the easiest business to start. That’s why everyone is doing it and you don’t earn any respect for it. That’s why you’re butt hurt. I love crossfit but can’t stand all these wannabe coaches and “entrepreneurs” that just want to fill their pockets. Get a real job before you bitch about nobody respecting you or your hole in the wall gym. Not everybody gets a boner over exercising like you. Most people just want to have general health and fitness. Not get yelled at because their Olympic lifts aren’t good enough for you. I’m surprised your big head fits through the front door.
Amen! Now, can this snowflake please have a cupcake? ;)) I kid I kid!
Opinions are like assholes and I’m about to share mine. I actually agree with him. I didn’t get offended after reading this. This is his box he can run it the way he wants and if you don’t like it you don’t have to come like he said. You do have to work for things in life you don’t just get them handed to you And people that expect things handed to them are weak. Not having a pity party for myself but for example I have rheumatoid arthritis a severe case. my entire body hurts all the time yes I take medicine for it I also take another Medicine it’s crossfit. My autoimmune disease would be a great excuse to not work out but that would be if I were week Minded…which I am not. I admit I’m not a very big person or superstrong but when I am there I give it hell everything I have. I have to Earn my strength through hard work and prayer to Jesus Christ The Lord!!! God bls u, Danika
You are correct, you are an asshole. I suppose your “approach” will appeal to certain athletes, that would not be me. And if any of my friends were to ask me about Cross Fit, I would recommend they discuss it with someone other than yourself who shows such disdain for the “average” athlete and who resorts to dropping F bombs in a blog to help make his point. You are right, you are an asshole.
There are many rooms in our house. If this guy and this box gives you an orgasm, then gigitty! You have found your place. If it leaves you wanting, so be it, find someplace which suits you better. You are not only joining a gym, you will hopefully become part of a community. Me,I lucked out, first time out of the box (pun intended) and found a place which has a great attitude, competitive spirit and the two best CF competitors in the area.
Your next rant should be about people who cheat their reps, or short them to “win” a box WOD.
Well, you definitely are an asshole. I personally like the approach that if you’re running a business, that you treat outsole with a little respect and don’t tell at them because they just walk in or didn’t click all the links on your site and ask a question that’s available online. People will do this until the end of time. That being said, if its working for your box, more power to you! Just not a place I’d probably ever join. But, to each his own.
Treat people*
Bloody gold, i’ve never been to your training studio but i like the sound of it! No fucking around, straight business!
Couldn’t of said it any better myself to the above.
You sir just shared many of my inner-most thoughts in this article. This coming from someone who also not only owns and runs a box (CrossFit Doom Room in Oklahoma Cuty), but who also has a strength-biased box.
Bravo, my friend. Bravo.
SOMEONE’s having a bad day
I want to be “Butt Hurt” Jon’s friend… even is that is the only thing he said.
Grow up. When you’re on your deathbed, the last thing you’ll think about it is how awesome it was to be an asshole. If you had a tad of appreciation for others that shaped how you are now, you’d understand my point.
Hey, I looked around & found a photo of this douchebag’s gym in action competing at some event:
And another of the formerly bullied little angry ginger himself:
The best part of this trainwreck of a business homepage is that on the about me page he says “These pursuits keep me very humble”
Humble, huh?
I think you need a new dictionary.
Glad you spoke your mind; gotta love the USA; now here is mine:
Like your strength and discipline; nothing wrong with pushing people to be responsible in their workout and responsible for cleaning up after. Nothing wrong with speaking your opinion loud and clear; how else will you ever learn to be better than you are if you never get feedback because you never spoke you mind out loud.
however, be happy people are attracted to watching you; maybe you should consider getting training on multi tasking/attention to focus.; keeping focus on your workout instead of who’s watching; then you would be even more appealing to come back to watch again and would not turn people away from ever joining crossfit seeing your attitude representing the company. Maybe then you could be even more of a super trainer as you give your client more attention instead of using your energy to yell at people to go away!
When people say: Tell me about crossfit; thats your opportunity to shine; sell yourself; sell your company and bring in more business. Unless you are satisfied with the few clients you have only because they love crossfit and not necessarily your business demeaner.
Strict on hiring; I say YEAH; I woudl only want the best of the best to train me; so kuddos!
I like truth; no beating around the bush; but a little praise along the way; never hurt anyone! As a matter of fact it makes an athlete work harder knowing they want to please and show off their talent!
Everyone is a fitness “Expert” hum. I thought you believed in being able to speak your mind why then do you feel no one else can; appears you are hypocryte? People are only educated on what they are exposed to; they learn more as they reach out and get other opinions. Maybe some are wrong; maybe some are exact; maybe some don’t really matter; but the point is everyone is trying their best and we only learn from what we are exposed to. If someone is telling you what they were taught in past, great, learn from that on how to approach your client to learn a new way of thinking; trying new ways may just work! Oh wait thats right you are the only right one in the world and only you know all the answers I forgot, sorry. When you started did you know all you knew today? If what you know today is different from what you believed in the past would you like someone telling you that youre an idiot from your past teaching?
I do like your analyogy of who you listen to and can admit what you are not an expert at; this is good! Now maybe you can teach your clients how to go about learning and the best ways to make sure its great info instead of downgrading them for who they have been exposed to and not make them feel they are so stupid for listening to others.
God helps those who help themselves: yes, I love that saying. Glad you do also, and God also has patience and understanding to help others get to where they need to be. Are most people lazy; hum, well being I dont know everyone in the world but do agree I have seen many lazy people I can’t not acuratly speak on your statement. I believe sometimes it may not be lazy; its a habit or depression. Some may reach out knowing they want out of the rut but dont know how; it takes hard work for sure to work out; but also to get the mind set to do it. You may have the workout down for your clients; Yeah for you! Now if you can just take your psych0ology studies and learn how to get into their minds to help them mentally; you may just become a superstar! Oh wait hum I just realized it’s possible you may be lazy too; you may need to ask yourself this? Are you too lazy to work even harder to get your clients results by helping them help themselves by believing they can and will do it by praising them and staying on them all along the way.
Let me share a little story; I was once very depressed, my mother died, my long term relationship was over and I had gained weight from a long hour office job and being a single mother didn’t allow me to get to the gym. So, once I was more free I decided I wanted it bad enough to join a gym; not thinking I would ever get results that I did; but just a little healthier. Guess what….. I had an amazaing trainer who when I said I can’t make it he called me and said get your butt in here; it’s about you not your ex who cares about him or what he is doing this is you! Does a trainer have to do that to push you by calling you at home because he got a message you were not coming in? Absolutely not he could just take his hour pay for free as I still had to pay for the session. This guy called me and gave me an amazing pep talk and made me respect him more than any trainer I ever had in my life. He was even young so I had no idea how he had so much wisdom. He got me in there; everytime I thought of my mother or my ex and cried he got my mind off it and worked me even harder. He knew just what to do to manage someone like me and he did it well. He was not lazy; he knew not every client is the same and everyone is different therefore you have to approach different personalities and different people in general differently. There is not only one way that works for everyone. He praised me along the way; told me how great I was doing. Then one day when I started seeing results and getting stronger with more endurance he then said. You know when you came in here you really sucked but look at you now. I laughed thinking wow you always told me how great I was doing in the beginning so I was thinking gee I was doing good and now you tell me I sucked; ha ha. Guess what he made it happen; he got me over the depressed hump in a month and made me want it so bad I couldnt stop; now that was a trainer!!!!!! John I luv ya whereever you are today! Was I lazy, probably, did I want it, yes, but did I know how to go about wanting it bad enough to overcome my pains and laziness, no. He did though. He could have given up on me when I said I can’t lift that; but no he didint’ everytime I said I can’t lift that; he gave me an even heaver one the next round. I have had many trainers who said oh you can’t lift that ok and gave me less weight not him. I learned to keep my mouth shut at times so I didn’t have to lift more but being thats hard for me it rarely did. He was amazing; I am a 5’1″ girl I am no boxer; and he had me pushing a horse across a gym; throwing punches and all, of which I never imagined I would ever do.
I believe in hard work; if you want it you have to work your toosh off to get it. When a new client comes in that hasnt worked out; its not easy… their heart is a pumping their body is aching and they feel like they just want to rest. I learned (from my trainer) even whenn I was aching I came back the next day to work out more. If only those who already know how to work out came to train their minds came to train with you; well you may be loosing out on much more business and respect from those you turned their lives around.
CHALLENGE: I dare you to take on a few of those so called “lazy” people who you usually push out the door and see if you can overcome your laziness and change them around. Can you do it? Are you willing to take the challenge? Do you think you are capable of taking a normal minded person with no discipline for working out and make them into a superstar that you are? After all I did see your statement of how you loathe laziness 🙂 FYI so do I, especially when its me being the lazy one. I never judge others who are going thru that depressed laziness as I know some have very legitimate situations that may be a reason they became that way and they just don’t know how to get away from it.
Granted you are right about SOME people thinking the world should be handed over to them being they never have had to work hard in their life. This may be your 2nd challenge to take a selfish non hard worker (is that a word; lol) and make them into a hard working appreciate person; good luck! Oh wait that may mean you would have to work even harder; hope that is not a problem for you. I have faith in you and know you can do it! I did enjoy your reference to those with an excuse; so what exactly is your excuse for turning all those challenging clients away?
Pointer: Maybe you could figure a way to explain to those who are injured the importance of getting it looked at by a Dr before injuring it further, as they continue to complain. Then My thought is you would not have to write a novel complaining about all the things you don’t like about your job! There you go; just a thought! Then I would not feel compelled to respond to your novel in hopes of even helping you a pinch!
Adults not following instructions: Hum, I have not seen your site and after reading this not sure I even want to look; but is it user friendly; is it clearly marked where to find info? Maybe it is; maybe it’s not. And for those busy people who never get on the computer whats wrong with going above and beyond to share the policies even though your job is just to train? Or is it you don’t knwo them yourself and you don’t want to look like an idiot having to go out of yoru way to pull them up to share the answers? If not, then have a little compassion to your clients; not everyone wants to read when they worked all day and they have a trainer who can tell them in a matter of minutes. But that may require you to speak; yikes.
If you turned away the solicters politely maybe they would remember you adn refer a client to you; maybe if you allowed gawking you’d get more interested in joining your team; maybe if you had someone there when you were closed to tour you’d gain more profit. I can honestly say I don’t read every sign posted on every door I walk into; do you?
? for you; so when you do go into someones house and forget to take off your shoes; has anyone called you an A – hole and wrote a long novel about idiots who don’t respect their rules? Can not this time be used by finding ways to overcome these challenges you speak of in lieu of complaining about them. I am sure we are on the same page when we say life is not peaches and cream and all humans are different; which in turn means even in our daily lives at work we will run across all kinds and if we are in business we must learn to deal with all types. Does this mean you have to let a customer complain they don’t want to work hard; no you just find a way to make them work hard and change their mindset. Does it mean you blast them all in a public forum so they can see what you really think of them so they never come back or refer anyone; no; you deal with each situation indivdually.
Are you special? I am sure you are and just as unique as every snowflake so are all people. If you want only robots at your gym well maybe you should make a sign to post so that no one else will apply.
Don’t be so hard on yourself calling yourself nasty names like A-hole. After all we are all human we all get frustrated; we all think what we have in place will work for all but then realize it doesn’t. then we get frustrared because our plan didnn’t work as we thought. Well my advice to you is figure a way to overcome those challenges and do it with compassion and patience. Nothing wrong with thinking what you do; we all should admit even if we didn’t say it we may have thought it so whats the difference? I am glad you posted all this; I am glad you shared your true feelings. I can see you are all about making it happen for those who want it. If you only take those types of clients because you are incapbably of handling all others do byou have trained professinoals who are more educated to take on those clients. If you don’t maybe you need to change it up a bit in your hiring process to cover all types. I guarantee your business will boom even more. Why settle for what you have when there is much more waiting for you?
Good Luck to you and I hope this novel may have given you a few more ideas. Some how I am getting a vibe you may be thinking I am a A-hole; I assure you I am not; I just want to help an A-hole when I can; and truly I don’t think you are one; that was you calling yourself that. It’s possible one of your clients deals in A-hole rehab; maybe you can talk to one of them if you feel you are this.
Good Luck to you!
PS: If this is not spell checked I am sorry; it took me long enough to write it so I don’t want to spend more time checking it not sure it really matters.
Sincerely,
Just Sharing My Thoughts
Entertaining rants make the worst business plans.
Please send all the people who piss you off to me. I’ll graciously take care of them and happily accept their payments. You can even come work for me when you fail. I need a clean-up boy who REALLY HATES STUFF, like dirt. You can use the mop to practice your OLY skills.
Hilarious. Absolutely excellent post.
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As an aside, this thread (and 90% of the replies) have brought out some of the worst from crossfitters I have ever seen.
I’m curious how many people who are responding negatively about this post are affiliate owners? If not, what do you do for a living?
You see, even though we affiliate owners love our jobs, we all reach a threshold of how much we can take. My husband and I have been affiliate owners for three years, but have been strength and conditioning coaches for almost 14 years before CrossFit. And after so many years of listening to people offer empty excuses for why the “can’t” say no to alcohol, sugar, treats, sleeping in instead of working out you get a little burned out. And so, you start focusing your attention, time, and knowledge on the people who give back: they give you back effort, commitment, dedication, attention, respect. And when you can afford to, you slowly start drawing a line in the sand, a line which people who do NOT give back are not allowed to cross. It’s the only way to 1) stay sane and 2) not get bitter and start hating what you do. Are we elitist at our box? No. I have a 74 year old woman who Olympic weightlifts with me. Is she ever going to snatch in the triple digits? No. But she is there early, doing her mobility, every session. She stays afterwards and stretches. She does the homework I give her. She pays on time! And…when she was diagnosed as pre-diabetic last year she changed her diet drastically. To the point where her endo wrote, “Congratulations on curing yourself in the gym” at the top of her follow up labs. THAT is how everyone should be. If a 74 year old can do it, everyone can. BTW, she works, volunteers at the animal shelter, and at a breast cancer resource center, so time isn’t abundant for her. My point is, it isn’t about how much you’re lifting, it’s about your respect for the knowledge of the person coaching you. And you show that respect through commitment and follow-through.
Attacking another angle: What if you’re a doctor? Or a lawyer? Would you keep people in your practice who consistently ignore your advice? Would you just let people walk into your practice and move furniture, exam tables, get out instruments? Would you stop the work you were doing on one patient because another patient walked in without an appointment and wanted to ask you questions? Would you get annoyed if all of your policies were posted, but everyone thought THEY should be the exception? Of course! And I’ve met plenty of doctors and lawyers who have been pretty goddamned rude about telling clients about their policies…but guess what? If it’s a good doctor or a good lawyer who’s going to get me where I need to be, who cares? I’m not there to be their friend. I’m there to get a professional service. CrossFit should be no different. When did it happen that people felt that they were paying for therapy, babysitting, coddling, and friendship? Being realistic and straightforward isn’t being an asshole, it’s called “not wasting anyone’s time.” If you want someone who will clean up after you, listen to your sad stories, or tell you what you want to hear instead of the truth, hire a personal trainer at a globo gym, because that’s usually all they’re good for.
And to the guy who asked about Regionals rankings (BTW, since this is so important to you, I finished 20th in SoCal this year) OF COURSE they didn’t send a team to Regionals. He stated in the article that they’re a strength-biased gym. Does this mean they don’t get people fit? No. It means that because Regionals aren’t a strength-based competition, they probably won’t send a team…but I bet they’re strong as hell! Regionals aren’t the only metric to measure elite fitness.
Good post! I’m in the business of orthopedic surgery and I can’t tell you how hard it is to be honest with the patients. I just realised that I have to say “you are fat” and “smoking gives you cancer etc, you have to stop it” and “you have to go and work out some” to the patients to make them understand! But they all just stare at you, start cry or get mad and rush home to that significant other and wine and say something like “buhuuuu that MF doctor said I was fat, the’re all mean bastards. All doctors just play golf and make Money and do nothing.” or something like that. 🙂
Well its the same thing with crossfit, coaches are not there to make you feel all warm and cosy, they’re there to help you get fit in a safe way!
You are the type of coach/box that gives CrossFit. Bad name. It would be very sad to be member in your box. Instead of disparaging those who walk in with questions, take the time to explain CF and its benefits. Why it’s different t. Why it’s better. Why it costs more. CF is intimidating, scary and strange for many who’ve never seen it. Yes your box should preach virtuosity of movement but remember not every member is elite but encouragement is best.
You should’ve set the margins on the text of this post to shape it like one massive erection. Please continue to write angry. DESTROMINATE.
I’m a member of one of Thelargest boxes in the world with an elite staff of coaches ( including a head coach who’s a Games athlete and 3x region champ). Thank God none of them are like you. Do thu push? Yes. Do they correct? Yes. But they also preach community and the gospel of CrossFit. We have members at all levels and all feel equal. That’s the beauty of CF and you have sadly missed out on it. I hope you can reverse course in time to save your box and not give CF a big black eye in your town.
Kabkates….. y u do dis?!
bane why all deese krawsfiters mad at me? wen de krawsfit hewdkwaters set dat bar hi wit not tekin no sheet frem peeple de don like. like dis http://www.inc.com/magazine/201307/burt-helm/crossfit-empire.html an dis http://www.inc.com/burt-helm/CrossFit-business-model.html an dis http://www.inc.com/burt-helm/crossfit-social-media.html
Jeez, what an asshole!
From a fellow affiliate owner – your article sucks, your attitude sucks. Maybe take the time and go back to why you actually started training people in CrossFit, because sure as shit, you’ve forgotten it’s not about you, it’s about them.
I think he’s right where he’s always been for why he started training people in CF – he has no other marketable skills. He’s not skilled at this either, but he’s apparently still failing to make the Olympic team. And last I checked talc and unitards don’t pay for themselves. So he started training. I noticed that his “about me” page didn’t say that he has a degree in psychology – in fact it reads as though he quit studying psychology so he could make money being angry at people and making muscles. Have you read his other crap? He is downright humiliating to people who’ve been injured and are limited in what workouts they can do. Zero empathy – they teach that a lot in psychology. No, he thinks those are just excuses and people are lazy – his analogy was to the person who lost a limb. Huge difference between that and say, a back or knee injury. What a pathetic excuse for a human being. Karma would suggest that one day this clown will blow out his back trying to clean & jerk – and when he does I hope to be right there to mock him for his inability to lift. Karma.
Bravo. Great article.
Reblogged this on nowhiteflags and commented:
Read it. It’s so ridiculously true. How many couch experts have told you how to workout? How you’re doing it wrong? Why they know better? They don’t. Plain and simple.
you don’t even lift, bro.
Yeah, I totally never lift
When folks come to my house I don’t charge them 150-200 bucks to visit. While I appreciate your frustrations or being a touch short here and there, you are still running a business and serving customers and potential customers whether you like it or not. That means tolerating a few inconveniences and questions so long as they are within reason.
Additionally, when you take pride if being an asshole then you aren’t just being an asshole, you are being a complete douche bag, dick head.
Most importantly, owning a Box doesn’t give you a free pass to make all of CrossFit look like a bunch of condescending, callous pricks. That’s how your post comes across.
I suppose you have a right to your opinion. Just be prepared for those who respond to have their opinions as well.
@ JustSharlngMyThoughts…thank you so much for taking the time to say all that I was thinking. Been there done that with a crossfit trainer just like this. Totally takes all the “what-could-be-a growing-experience” out of it by making it a “radical religion”!!! And in the process he totally came across as the lazy one!!!!
@ Shalak Moore.. Where are you/your gym located? I’m not lazy (in fact very in shape and always motivated to better myself) and would gladly give you my money for some guidance that I clearly am not innately and surperiorly born with. Thanks!
I’ve been around a while in the crossfit community, I am a coach and have trained with some of the best. You my friend sound like (hopefully) a very young egocentric newbie with a few life lessons yet to learn. You probably started off with an athletic background and excelled quickly. Coach well and efficiently, but really you do much better to lose the ego.
Lord, the amount of people who completely missed the point of this article is staggering.
He is not insulting those who are beginners/unfit, he is complaining about the Energy Sucks who give every reason under the sun why they can’t progress. It’s about attitude, not ability. Having whiners (and they come in ALL fitness levels, trust me) in your facility destroys the supportive atmosphere. It’s one of his jobs as owner to defend that atmosphere.
He talks about having standards – in your exercises and in your coaching staff. What is wrong with that? Some people are just flat out bad coaches. Some movements are just flat out not up to standard.
He also talks about those people who would rather send an email than google for the simple answer. This wastes the owner’s time that they could spend making their gym better.
Or those people that would interupt a CrossFit class because they didn’t bother to read and/or have some common courtesy. Why should those people be coddled? Why should we have to be pulled away from all the athletes working hard in class, just for the one schmuck who thinks they’re special. How is that fair for the class? It’s not, so an owner may have to be short with an idiot so he can get back to coaching.
Again, it all comes down to those people that unfairly waste the owners time. I am pretty sure he’s not telling them to F off to their face, but just using this post as a major catharsis. If he was actually bashing these idiots heads in (as I’m sure he has dreamed of doing), then he wouldn’t have a need to rant here.
In closing – work hard, stop sucking, quit whining.
There’s 3 kinds of gym owners:
The kind that think it would cool to own a gym. Those don’t last, they sale out to one the other kinds.
The kind that hated any member that doesn’t ‘kill it’ at the gym as if its the only reason to workout, so he opens his own with that premise, to keep out the healthy ego-even keeled customers. Usually fold cuz as you know, 75% of revenues in an average gym comes from the ‘donations’ from the uncommitted members.
Then the kind that wants to give to others what has been given to them or had naturally. Usually do well with a strong sales staff because of its welcoming environment.
Cross fitters need to realize….IT’S JUST AN EXERCISE PROGRAM…not a right of passage, not a prestigious platform, matter of fact, its a BOX and you guys tend to close yourselves in it and come out with a chip in your shoulder.
I would agree with your first line – those just stepping into the business because they like to work out, or think it’s cool, they eventually get weeded out. CrossFit allows that lawyer who hates his job to just drop some money for the Xfit cert and open his own gym. This is not good, but it is the way it is.
With your second gym owner type, it sounds like you’re whining for being asked to work hard. If someone is coming into CrossFit, I want them to do their best. This is regardless of their age or ability. If they slack off and don’t work hard in class, then I don’t want them bringing down the other people that are. If you just want to slide by, then waste your time elsewhere. Different coaches will handle these situations differently, but in the end an athlete who screws around needs to leave.
This does not make me or others that work hard off-keel egomaniacs. It just makes us people who work hard for something we want.
Your third kind description confuses me with “what has been given to them or had naturally”. I feel this is another indicator that hard work scares/intimidates you. Any athlete can tell you that while some may rise faster than others, EVERYONE has to put in a ton of hard work. Nothing is given to anyone. That’s the beautiful lesson inside the gym – you get what you put in.
Nothing about this post says that CrossFit is a right of passage or some special club. It’s many people’s livelihoods to become coaches and/or affiliate owners. They take the safety, progress, and community of their gym seriously. This post is about those people that come in and waste the coach’s time.
Jim, well stated, in all your replies. I courteously ask people who interrupt class to wait til I am finished to explain CrossFit to them. I can’t leave my athletes, even though they know what they are doing. I don’t have a big staff.
Just because I am nice and supportive but have standards (pretty even tempered basically) doesn’t mean that I don’t see the things in this blog happen and they make it harder to run a business.
Time is precious. I need to coach, program, do admin, and clean the floor and bathroom and I still spend time helping people with their problems while I am not coaching. No problem, I love it all, but it has to get done and my number one goal is to have a great environment for everyone. I will help people with their workout problems, scaling, injuries, confusion, but I cannot help a poor me attitude. I’m not talking about a person having a bad day. I have cried during workouts when I had cancer or my parents were sick. Exercise releases stress and some days it is hard…but people need to show up knowing that everyone will be treated equally and expected to try. The more people try, the more they get. Both because it allows me to help them more easily and it’s the nature of the beast. The more you put into CrossFit the more you get out of it.
You are a dick. Let me explain something. Boxes are popping up left and right. The market will eventually be over saturated with them. The boxes with a good product will servive. You my friend do not have a good product. You may be a great coach but you clearly lack compassion, and basic customer service skills. So guess what dick head, keep being a dick a turning away new business with your bad attitude. Your box is a business and you suck at it.
you, my new friend, are right on ALL accounts. please bring this mentality to Australia. Cheers.
Great post! You either get it or you don’t…
[…] On Being An Asshole « Southern Maryland CrossFit's Blog https://crabcakesncrossfit.wordpress.com/Crabcakes n' CrossFit. It's what Maryland does. … I feel it is in poor taste and choice of wording due to the fact people have the REAl deal Cancer and my husband happens to be a Cancer pt. Who was very fit and athletic up … […]
Bobbi is this you?….. You sound just like my box owner…….AND I LOVE HER! Ya’ll can keep the warm and fuzzy coaches at the warm and fuzzy boxes. My box owner majors in BADASSERY!….. Just saying. This may sound kind of narcissistic……. Cause it is.
You are an elitest! You call yourself a coach a teacher yet insult the vast majority of the population, the under motivated. No your not either of those, you are the angry contractor who doesn’t want to here input from his clients, you are the frustrated grocery clerk that gets pissed when a customer forgets an item and stalls the process to go get it, you are the disgruntled athlete that’s trapped in a ‘box’ who is angry at those less enthusiastic about the ‘Amanda’ day. Climb out of your box and change some lives asshole!! Who wants to train the experienced? Go search out a physical train wreck and turn them into….. an average person, with a healthy self esteem.
You should hire this guy to coach for you: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=syhb3z4pTFQ
My name is Brock Wilson (just dont want to be critical and anonymous) and I own a small affiliate in NC that sees a very broad spectrum of ability in our membership. The letter is definitely amusing, and I can certainly relate to much of what Mr. Farris complains about, but some of his impatience is misplaced and harmful to the brand. Sure, we want high movement standards, and we want people to put their equipment away, but getting all “butt-hurt” when people call and ask “So tell me about CrossFit” is ridiculous. I’m happy to fill someone in about what we do and how it gets done. If this guy thinks otherwise, he is probably better suited to being a ‘head coach” or “programming director” rather than an affiliate owner. Patience and quality instruction aren’t contrary attributes.
Brock,
Well Said. The uneducated, new people to crossfit are what will keep most Boxes in business over the next few years. Why would you want to draw a line between the elitist and the novices?
This is possibly my favorite article of all time. I manage a CF gym too, and this blog is basically a written dialogue of what runs through my mind 10x a day. I think I said “hell yes” about 50 times while reading it. Seriously, if you’re too damn stupid or lazy to find answers to basic questions (like scheduling) on the website you managed to get your browser to, you’re probably too stupid or too lazy to hack it in a CrossFit class. If you’re too damn inconsiderate to do things like: find out the gym’s drop-in policy, or take the extra 3 seconds to find that answer on the website you’re already looking at, or to show up to class on time, or to bother paying attention to the instructor, then you don’t deserve a very considerate response either.
Anneke, you were spot on too.
To the other Affiliate Owners who are hopping all over the writer about “the shitty attitude” here, you may not have the balls to post this yourselves, but if you don’t think this stuff at least 5x a day, you either have a gym in Alaska with 10 members and would just kill to have a drop-in show up, or you haven’t been in the CF business more than about 12 months.
Fuck everyone else!! I get what you are saying. You are simply running a business and like to devote your time to your business and not the nuances that people could intuit for themselves. Hats off to you!!
Sorry are you an a-hole because you have to babysit newbies? or you an a-hole because people can not listen?
I pretty much agree with everything you say but in the end there are only a handful of Elite Crossfiters paying a BOX that understand your attitude. the Bulk of the people in the Crossfit craze are weak physically AND Mentally. They are the people you will begging for once the crossfit craze dies down. and believe me….it will, just like every other fad. The dedicated ones that have seen the light will still do it.
Tried to reply to Cathy Reese
Like assholes
[…] Athletes Biggest Opponents: Their Own Breasts There Are No Silver Bullets On Being an Asshole Yoga for Athletes, Part 1 Why does it feel like I’m walking on shards of […]
I do agree with your article, although I don’t agree with your fowl language u use often. I am I offended by it “no”, but there’s always a way you can tell people things without being so offensive! People will listen, if u change your approach. Great article!
Ah – the arrogance of a business that’s currently doing well. As certain as death and taxes, I tell ya. I’d love to hear you be rude to potential customers on the phone after the world has moved on from you.
Love Crossfit – but there is nothing awesome about being a dick.
thought about therapy as a nice vent session?
Pretty sure you will always be an asshole. Congrats.
[…] link to the full post is here for your reading pleasure. Over the next few days I’ll be posting highlights on the […]
I am not a CF Owner…nor am I Cross Fit Certified but I teach (workout) at what I would call a pretty high level of fitness so I feel I have the right to comment here. What I find most disheartening is all the negativity that this Blog has brought about. It would have been a much better read if you told us all how you turned someone’s “weaknesses” into “strengths”…or how you turned someone’s “fear” of working out into someone’s “excitement”…that my friend is “Forging Elite Fitness”…..guys like you have people knock on their door and beat their ass because they picked on or insulted the wrong person…..here is my advice to you…..if Mr. Miyagi comes to your Box do not let him in…he isnt there to workout…he is there to Bust You Up….good luck…hopefully your Patience and Kindness grow the way your ego has….
This is a horribly written article.
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I like you enjoy reading their comments and sometimes get ideas from them.
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Deep deep down in there, you are probably a super nice guy but don’t worry. Your secret is safe here.
[…] Facebook & IG, and to the “It’s All About Me All-Stars”; I am still an asshole. I would like to apologize one by one about the assholey things that I do. I was told that in […]
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